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The spy has been around and seen some things that just can’t be unseen. He’s probably scarred for life!

Recently at a small lake SE of the centre of Perth, a few “minor” incidents were observed.


Every time sailing takes place on this lake, everyone is extremely careful to avoid a water fountain located close, but nowhere near to being in the way of the start/finish line. That is until a well-known pink boat skipper thought better of it. Yes, he sailed straight into the fountain and the boat was stuck there  .

A very helpful, and again well-known, full length wader wearing, state registrar offered to assist the flailing pinky, only to slip on the debris on the lake bottom and fall over into the icy cold winter rain swollen lake! Did I observe a faint smirk on the face of our national newsletter editor, skipper of all boats pink’s face? Yep, bit of laughter there as well.

Not to be out done, let’s call him “Smithy”, (that’s a common name so we’re not giving the real culprit away) bought his boat in to check the settings. Now either Smithy has a long neck strap or short legs, ‘coz when he bent over the boat he dipped the transmitter into the icy cold water. I’m thinking it never worked the same after that. He was last seen driving off into the distance.

Back to the sailing........ Pinky has a problem with concentration and sometimes has the attention span of a goldfish. He took his eyes off his boat and it promptly sailed into the reeds on the shoreline. The lake being over full, meant he sailed a long way in. Very hard to do, well done pinky. This was much to the delight of the other sailors and to a mother water bird who could see her nest and offspring being slaughtered by the invading magenta monster. The water bird went to town in defence of her nest. We don’t know if any further damage was inflicted on the magenta monster above what the fountain had already done. I gather pink is not a bird’s favourite colour........ My sub-spies have told me that the council ranger has been past daily looking for the owner of the fauna marauding monster. Charges might be imminent. I can just see the judges face when exhibit “A” is produced. The pink boat – PINK!!!!!! Who in their right mind............ Guilty as charged.

Of course our hero of the day in his neck high waders was called to the rescue again. We all thought that he was very brave to front the irate bird, but off he waded to retrieve the magenta monster with no thought for his own safety. Some on the shore asked, “Why bother.”

Changing tack...... a well-known RC sailor who has just moved to the northern suburbs and fixes roller doors to pay for his bad habits, was recently observed inflicting painful damage onto his trusty work vehicle. The car with trailer were parked in the clients driveway, across the footpath (very naughty) and half inside the garage. Said door specialist returned to his beast to find the doors locked and the keys in the ignition. Stop laughing......... He was observed to try everything, demolishing the spare electronic door opener in an attempt to get it working. Next was a piece of aluminium angle iron. Out with his biggest hammer and using the metal trailer as a bench, he hammered the life out of the aluminium making it a piece of somewhat dented flat bar. The noise had the home owner out to see what was going on. The tradie proceeded to then insert the bar into the door jamb of the car, demolishing the door seal and a fair bit of apparently “not needed” car paint. After a few attempts and a bit of refining of the flat bar, success was at hand (some might say something else was at hand). The door was opened and all was right with the world again. Back came the home owner with a little contraption to safely open the car door a little so a something small like a coat hanger could be used to do the same job. Not as much noise and no damage. No fun either . Could the home owner be a car thief who was giving away the secrets of his trade?

Back to the day’s sailing.....
There was also another inductee into the RC Sailing “Hall of Flame”. Our hero of the day, with the neck high waders who slipped over in the lake and filled them up with icy cold water, and could only be heard squeaking in a high pitched voice after that, thought more entertainment was necessary. He lost control of his boat. Not unusual in the least when our Captain is around. On closer inspection, smoke and a burning smell were coming from any opening in the hull. Yes, where there is smoke there is fire........... Pity I arrived at the lake too late to witness the carnage 

He is welcomed to the “Hall of Flame” and is added to the growing list of names on the honour roll
• Captain Blackwire – for setting alight a Lipo battery in his pocket on a wet day. Smoke coming from everywhere  . A memorable moment indeed.
• Banga Ray Bassett – who left his rig box on a public BBQ, only to see his rig box smouldering and the rigs inside melted into a puddle of plastic.
• President Sean Wallis – who paid to go to Sydney to attempt to burn his hull. Smoke was observed billowing out of his hull, and the burning smell stayed for ages. The other skippers were there to sail a state championship......

All in a day’s sailing........